Moving out of lockdown

While we’re all pleased that restrictions have now been lifted, you may be worried about making the transition to a more ‘normal’ way of life. We’ve all been at home for so long that stepping out into the world may make you feel anxious or fearful. Many of us may have lost friends or family, been unwell or suffered financially during the pandemic, and may not yet be ready to move on so quickly. This page has some advice that could help.

Tips for moving out of lockdown

Tip #1: Take things slowly

If we believe what we read online, everyone is desperate to rush out and start socialising again as soon as the rules allow. But you may well feel nervous about the thought of seeing more people, going into shops, using public transport or going back into the workplace. So don’t feel you need to do everything at once. Take things slowly. Maybe see a couple of friends in the park one weekend, and go shopping or visit a local attraction like a museum the next. Don’t judge yourself for going more slowly than other people you know or read about.

If you’re arranging to meet friends, remember they too may be feeling nervous or anxious, so don’t push anyone into meeting if they don’t feel ready yet.

The Mental Health Foundation has some helpful advice on moving out of lockdown here.

Tip #2: Plan ahead

If you’re worried about getting out and about more, planning ahead will make things easier. For example, if the kids are clamouring for a visit to the zoo or the beach, you could plan your trip for a quieter time of day so you don’t have to travel in rush hour or face long queues or crowds. Allow plenty of time to get out of the house with everything you’ll need (face masks, hand sanitiser, tissues, etc) and don’t try to fit too much into one visit.

Tip #3: Take time for yourself

Often parents find that looking after themselves is the last thing on their list – the most important thing is the children, right? But you can’t pour from an empty glass, and if you’re feeling tired and low, it’s hard to be strong and supportive for anyone else. So don’t think of carving out a bit of “me time” as a selfish thing to do – it’s an important part of caring for your kids.

If you’re feeling tense, spending a few minutes a day doing some relaxation exercises may help. The Mental Health Foundation’s podcasts have lots of ideas you can try, including breathing techniques and mindfulness and meditation exercises. Relaxing and being mindful can help you focus on the present, rather than dwelling on the past or worrying about the future.

You can find lots more relaxation tips that are easy to incorporate into day to day life on the Mind to Mind website.

Tip #4: It’s okay not to feel okay

Just because we’re moving out of lockdown, doesn’t mean everything is automatically going to become amazing overnight. Many people are dealing with bereavement, financial issues, relationship problems or ill health. You may be feeling upset or angry about everything you and your children have missed out on, or isolated from friends and family you haven’t seen for ages and nervous about reconnecting ‘in real life’. The difficult emotions these problems stir up aren’t just going to go away just because restrictions are lifting.

So if you’re feeling low or unhappy or angry, this is nothing to be ashamed of. You don’t have to hide these feelings, or feel that you have to “pull yourself together” or “soldier on”. Instead, talk to someone you trust about how you feel. This could be your partner, a friend or your GP. Or you may find it easier to call a helpline like NHS24 (111), Breathing Space (0800 83 85 87) or the Samaritans (116 123) or text Shout’s 24/7 crisis text service on 85258.

NHS Inform has advice on different aspects of your emotional health, like dealing with low moods, anger, fear and stress. You can also find mental health advice for parents, new mums and parents to be here on Parent Club.

Tip #5: Build on the positives

When you look back over the past year, you may well realise that not everything has been negative. Maybe you’ve spent more time outdoors, or discovered you like cooking, taken up a new hobby or enjoyed spending more time together as a family. Think about all the things that have gone well, and give yourself a well-earned pat on the back. Then consider how you could continue to fit these positive things into your life as restrictions lift.

Tip #6: Reduce negative thoughts

The way we think affects the way we feel, so negative thoughts can make us feel bad. No one wants to think negative thoughts. The trouble is, they tend to pop into our heads of their own accord! Sometimes, you can acknowledge the thought and then dismiss it. But sometimes, worrying thoughts get stuck. You’ll find tips for getting rid of them on our page on mental health advice for parents. NHS Inform also have a page on coping with stress which includes an audio guide to help you relax, and an anxiety self help guide.

How can I support my children as restrictions ease?

You may be worried about the impact the coronavirus pandemic is having on your child. While we still don’t know how much the pandemic will affect children, there are things you can do now to help. Children are often more resilient than we think, and by providing them with plenty of love and understanding you're supporting them to adapt to change when it comes.

Babies and toddlers

If your wee one has spent most of their life in lockdown, you may be concerned about how this will affect them. But try not to worry. By playing and chatting with them and comforting them when needed, you’re helping their brain grow and making them feel safe, cared for, and connected. Babies do best with just a few carers who are tuned in to their communications, sensitive to their cues and responsive. Our well being for wee ones section explains more about how the little day to day interactions you have with your baby and toddler can help them become confident, happy and emotionally healthy people.

You can find information about nearby services on the Perinatal and Infant Mental Health Fund website here.

Nursery and school age children

At this stage, children benefit more from interaction with others, which is why keeping ELC settings and schools open as much as possible has remained a priority during the pandemic. At this age, kids are still learning about and establishing friendships, and may have been quite lonely being separated from their friends.

Playing and spending time with their friends is a crucial part of all children’s development. However, some children may be feeling nervous about being with lots of other people so don't rush them. Our page on encouraging your child to spend time with others has advice if you're worried that your child is anxious about seeing people again.

Remember, children are constantly adapting to change, when they start nursery then start school, move into a new year at school, take up new activities or make new friends. Talking to your children and encouraging them to be honest with you about how they feel will help them face up to it. Listening to what they have to say and taking it seriously will help them feel valued.

You could also try asking them at the end of the day to think about three things that have gone well or that they’re grateful for. Even if those three things are always the hamster, pizza and Netflix!

You can find more tips for supporting your kids’ mental health here. If they’re acting up or being difficult, we’ve got lots of tips for coping here.

Older children and teens

Being a teenager is never easy, and the coronavirus pandemic has done nothing to make it easier. Our section on supporting your teen has lots of advice on how you can help them if they’re struggling.

In this short film, Professor Cathy Richards, Consultant Clinical Psychologist, shares advice on spotting signs that your child or teenager may be struggling with their mental health.

You could also suggest that your teen visits Young Scot’s Aye Feel website, which has information on how to look after their emotional wellbeing and promote a positive mindset, and support from organisations around Scotland.

Should I worry that my baby has had limited social interaction due to coronavirus? Will there be any long term effects?

This is such a worry for parents at the moment, and there has been a lot of talk in the media about babies ‘missing out’. But what babies need more than anything in the first year of life is consistent care from a parent or carer. So if your baby has had lots of interaction with you, then you’ve given them great foundations.

As restrictions ease and you’re able to give your baby new experiences, you may find that your baby is a bit hesitant, or gets easily scared, or doesn’t want to leave you. This is quite normal – it’s just a transition phase. Being presented with new experiences can be challenging and scary! Just acknowledge what they’re feeling, reassure them and give them time to get used to these new sights, sounds and experiences.

Remember not to overwhelm your baby by ‘catching up’ with social interactions! Take it slowly, at their pace, and expect it to take a bit of time. It’s a transition for them, just as it is for us.

What about my children's education?

You may be concerned that your child has missed out on learning over the past year, but try not to worry. In this short film, Dr Janet Goodall from the Learning Foundation explains that there’s no such thing as ‘lost learning’ and that children have been learning all the time during this strange situation.

What about going back into the workplace?

If you’ve been working from home and are now preparing to go back into the workplace, our page on returning to work has more information and advice.

What if I'm worried about money?

Money worries have been a big source of stress during the pandemic. If you’re struggling to make your money last to the end of the week/month or are worried about how you’ll pay your bills, you’re definitely not alone. But there is something you can do about it. If you have any money worries, or if you’re in debt and you want some advice, call the Money Talk Team for a free and confidential chat. Their friendly advisers will see what you might be entitled to, and offer advice to help you make the most of your money. You can find out more about the Money Talk Team here.

Our page on financial support during COVID-19 has more advice.